Banshee for hire

Are you tired of having peace and quiet during your meals? Are you bored with coherent, adult conversations with your mate? Do you like to annoy your fellow diners? Well, a screaming banshee is the answer for you!

The banshee is sure to wail at the top of his lungs anytime you dine with him in public. Simply present him with a spoonful of food and watch the magic unfold! The banshee comes standard with the automatic crescendo function...his volume will gradually increase throughout your meal until it finally reaches a glass-shattering pitch. If you find the automatic crescendo too slow for your taste, simply ignore the banshee momentarily and you're sure to be rewarded with ear piercing screeching immediately!

As an added bonus, the banshee comes with the "drop-repeat" cycle. What fun! Anything you hand the banshee is sure to be thrown to the floor for your retrieval again, and again, and again, and again, and... Great party trick!

If you act now, your banshee will arrive with a lifetime supply of Cheerios which will be devoured in handfuls with dozens more thrown to the ground. This is a favorite for restaurant waitstaff everywhere!

Hurry, this is an age-sensitive offer and won't last long (we hope!) Call now, 1-800-WORNOUT!

Shown: deluxe model, fully loaded with upgraded aesthetics package.